unexpected .

today was something different ..
this past week ive been feeling that things btwn you & i havent been the same since thanksgiving.
u claim that there isnt anything different, but i think we both know thats not true.
it is different, & its you.
i did a lot of thinking last night ..
& this morning i woke up feeling different than all the other days this past week ..
all the other days i felt down , needy , & craving for affection ; only to get the opposite from you .
but this morning , i didnt feel that way ..
right before i started to blog , i woke up from a dream filled with emotions that felt so real ..
i dreamt that i started developing feelings for someone else , & was no longer feeling down , needy , & craving for affection cuz i was getting it from "him" & not even realizing it ..
i'm not gunna lie , dreaming about something like that & it feeling so real , scares me .
all my focus has litterally been on us , & betterin things , but for some reason i dont feel the same effort coming from you as i use to .
its ironic how now that i'm trying , yer sitting back .
i'll admit .. u did it for a long time for me .. but i dont kno how long i can last doing what feel like ALONE .
my focus is on YOU . i wanna fix everything before there comes a chance for someone else to interrupt .

i hope my dream wasnt as serious as it feels ...



--- via my Blackberry 8900